So funny...

This is too funny not to share with any and every person that I can:





One of the Ramsey brothers who helped to create this comedic gem, Richard Ramsey, will be joining the City on a Hill Productions staff this summer. Check out the other films offered by the Ramsey brothers on YouTube.

Valiant, Vulnerable & Scandalous

"A woman who is living out her true design will be valiant, vulnerable, and scandalous." - John Eldredge

I first came across this quote while it was scrawled across a picture frame that my friend, Laura, had in her apartment. The picture was of a group of girls (including miss Laura) clad in pink t-shirts and shorts or capris - all of them hamming it up in semi-provocative poses. It was adorable! I asked her where the quote was from and what the story was behind the picture. She told me that the quote was from John Eldredge's book, "Wild at Heart" - and the story behind the picture was that this group of girls would regularly play pranks on their guy friends - and part of their signature was to have "scandalous" written out in pink. When I returned home after my visit with Laura, I wrote the quote on my bathroom mirror in red dry erase marker. Valiant, vulnerable, scandalous...which one of those words sticks out to you? Which one kind of scares you?

The one that still scares me is vulnerable. I love authenticity and transparency, and I desperately want to be like that but it requires so much vulnerability. One baby step at a time, I feel like I'm making some headway in this arena, but I have a LONG way left to go. I struggle the most with being vocally vulnerable. I don't mind opening as much when I'm writing in a blog like this or in an e-mail because well for one thing - it's not as though I have a massive blog audience...and I can eloquently craft and massage my written vulnerability, whereas in conversation you're kind of on the spot, and I often get anxious and my thoughts get all jumbled in my head and a lot of times it takes me while to mull things over before I know what I think about a topic and by then the discussion has usually moved on. And sometimes people just look at me and want me to talk - and I don't know what to talk about - I'm not some performance monkey that has magical conversation that will flow out of me if you look at me long enough...what do you want me to talk about? And I guess that's part of it to, is that a lot of times I don't talk because I don't know what the other person wants me to say. But why do I care so much if I say whatever it is that I think they want me to say? I feel like I have very strong values, standards, opinions - and yet I get caught up in worrying about what is it that they want me to say. How ridiculous is that? Umm, pretty darn...which then begins the downward cycle of getting frustrated with myself in that and the self-condemnation...and it's just ugly and silly. But please bear with me, I am trying to break free of this - your patience is much appreciated!

And scandalous - well that just sounds fun! And for me it relates back to my last blog and that whole trying new things and not worrying about failure. To be scandalous - shocking...hmmm, I may need some suggestions in this area. I'm usually pretty laid back and conservative. And how does one become scandalous and still stay within the bounds of godliness?

Then there is valiant, which I seem to equate more with strength - although it also connotes bravery and courage. Bravery and courage are things I don't always feel in possession of - especially since for me those are part of what I need to help me become more vulnerable - ugh. Strength, however, is something that I would claim to have plenty of - what with being a strong, capable, single woman who's got to push through and do it all on her own. Of course, this is also my downfall. All of this "strength" has turned into a nasty, hard, icy shell that is melting and even being lovingly chipped away by others to allow for more freedom to be vulnerable.

And that's really what I need to remember about vulnerability - there's freedom in vulnerability and transparency. No longer hiding part of myself away just because I don't think it's all that interesting or that I don't think others will find it all that interesting. And don't ask me what "it" is because I don't know. I don't know exactly what part(s) of me I'm hiding away, but I know that I do it - that I clam up a LOT in social situations.

So there you have it, that's me in relation to this quote...how does it speak to you?

There is no shame in failure, only in not trying

I must say, I wish I had heard this saying growing up. There is so much that I would go back and at least try. I would have tried to enjoy high school more rather than just focusing on the grades - same for college. Instead, having a perfectionist mentality instilled in me from as far back as I can remember - I refused to do things in public if I didn't know that I could do them well, which is pretty ridiculous because nobody is a master of anything that they try for the first time - but there you go, I did not want to try and fail and look like a fool in the process. I still struggle with that crazy kind of thinking, but I have been more prone to try new things of late. Granted there have been a few things that I've tried and ended up getting a little more out of hand than first anticipated,but you live and you learn. And well I'm a fairly late bloomer in this whole "trying new things" department.

With this move there have been plenty of new things I've had to step into not knowing how well I'd do or what the outcome might be. I've had to try my hand at fundraising again (which didn't work out so well the first time). I've had to try to find a new church to attend, a Bible study class, a small group, and just new friends in general. The next thing on my agenda is to try to start my own small group for women in my apartment. Now, I've done this several times before in Houston, but I already had a great, big, built-in group of female friends who attended the studies I led. This time my comfort level is lower because I'm still getting to know many of the women here, but I figure this will be another way to help build and cultivate those relationships. I haven't quite figured out what study I want to lead the group in - so suggestions are welcome!

The Office is Back!!!!

After waiting for too many months for the writer's strike to end, and then having to wait even longer for the writers to come back and create some new episodes...The Office is finally back! Last night was the first new episode and it was HILARIOUS. If you didn't get to watch it here is a sneak peek two-minute recap - enjoy!

The Pastor's Wife

I've been given a project by Shane (my boss) to read "The Pastor's Wife," by Sabina Wurmbrand and "In God's Underground," by Richard Wurmbrand. They are a missionary couple that endured many years of separation and imprisonment during the Communist reign over Rumania. As I am reading "The Pastor's Wife," I am continually in awe of Sabina - a woman who adores her husband, but she is also a strong and feisty companion who grounds her husband in their combined effort to reach all people for Christ in Rumania. Here are just a couple of instances where Sabina's forthrightness has reminded me of the kind of woman of God I desire to be:

The Communist leaders are pandering to a conference of religious leaders of all faiths, but Sabina and Richard knew better.

It was as if they spat in Christ's face. I could feel that Richard was boiling. So I told him what was already in his heart and said:
"Will you not wash this shame from the face of Christ?"
Richard knew what would happen: "If I speak, you will lose a husband."
At once I replied - it was not my courage, but given to me for the moment: "I don't need a coward for a husband."

To which her husband arose and spoke to the crowd. What a woman!

And then later on there is an opportunity for them to escape and leave Rumania, and Richard believes that it would be better for them to flee than to remain in Rumania. All this after a friend has come and reminded them of the words of the angel to Lot:

"Escape for thy life, look not behind thee."
When he (the friend) left, Richard asked me: "Don't you think that may have been a message from God? Why should he come to see us after so long, and repeat over and over, 'Escape for thy life?' Wasn't it a warning that I must save my life by fleeing?"
I said, "Escape for what life?" Then I went into the bedroom and opened the scripture where Jesus says: 'Whosoever will save his life shall lose it and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it."
I asked Richard, "If you leave now, will you ever be able again to preach about this text?"
We didn't speak again that night about leaving.

Reading Sabina's story reminds me of the stories that Neil (my pastor in Houston) tells about his wife, Marcie. One in particular where Marcie responded to Neil by saying, "What a small price to pay for integrity." Women unashamed to support and challenge their husbands to be blameless men of God. I love it!

More visitors!

Last week, my sister and several of her co-workers made the trek up to Louisville in a 15 passenger van. Can you believe they came here of all places for their "fun trip" together? Weird, but I feel like they all had a good time - for the most part - there were a few whiners along the way.

Monday:

They started their trek late Sunday evening and arrived in Louisville around 9am, tired and road-weary, but still ready for an afternoon of adventure in Louisville! After guiding them to a grocery store to pick up ingredients for dinner and making a stop in at the Homemade Ice Cream & Pie Kitchen for several of them to indulge in a nutritious breakfast of pie, I led them to the Bryans' home where they would be bunking during their stay. The girls (there were only two of them, including my sister) got the pleasure of staying upstairs. One in a double bed, and the other in a twin bed, and they had a bathroom to themselves. All six of the boys were relegated to the basement and had one bathroom to share amongst themselves. After they had sufficient time to stow away their stuff and freshen up, we headed to the Louisville Slugger Museum. Everyone seemed to enjoy the tour and taking lots of fun pics together. All the guys and Kati, also took advantage of the batting cages.

After we'd had our fill of the museum, we needed to fill our bellies, so we headed across the river to Indiana for some river-side dining before going on a tour of Schimpff's Confectionary. Now I must confess, I had some fun leading Chris Carter, who was driving the 15 passenger van, in a few circles around downtown before finally deciding to take the group across the river for lunch. After a most amusing tour at the confectionary, Mrs. Schimpff was simply incredible and bestowed us with many wonderful treats to taste, we headed back to the Bryans' where I dropped the gang off to get settled (and nap). Later that evening, I went back to the Bryans' to assist my sister in making individual pizzas for the whole gang. We created the pizza crusts from scratch using Marcy Bryan's pizza dough recipe, and even put the sauce on the pizzas - only requiring each person to put their own toppings on the pizza. It seems quite simple enough, but we did have a few boys who still needed "help" figuring out how to put toppings on their pizza. A couple of them even made some lovely chauvanistic comments and almost lost their finished pizzas to the hungry trash can. In the end, after Wendy and I had finished making everyone's pizzas - the rest of the gang did eventually pull together to do the cleaning. After indulging in our glutonous pizza feast, we all headed downstairs to watch "Dan in Real Life." If you haven't seen it - you must - if only to understand the hilarity of this line, "You are a MURDERER of love!" Ahhh, one of the poignant moments of communication between Dan and one of his teenage daughters.

Tuesday:

After a lazy morning of sleeping in, everyone decided they wanted to check out Lynn's Paradise Cafe for lunch. At first view everyone was filled with wonder and excitement as they took in the crazy eclectic nature of Lynn's. Ooo's and Aahh's were heard as each person tried to figure out what they were going to order from the delicious menu. Several people were making deals with one another to share their food in order to get to taste the wide array of things offered at Lynn's. My sister and I made such an arrangement, as I ordered the sinful Bourbon Ball French Toast (really much more of a dessert than a meal, but whatever), and she ordered the Greek Scramble - see that way we both got to indulge in savory and sweet. And even if we couldn't finish it all you knew that no one's food would go to waste - one of the boys (or even Kati) would happily finish it off.




Once we'd all sufficiently stuffed ourselves, the next stop was Zappos on our way out to Kart Kountry. I found it quite amusing how excited all the boys were about going to Zappos. I feel as though their anticipation of shoe shopping was more heightened than any of the girls. Most everyone walked away with a purchase from Zappos, and thus we were off to Kart Kountry to experience the longest go-cart track in the world!




Each person was signed up for two laps around the 1.5 mile long track. Annoyingly enough, Chris Carter came from behind to beat everyone in his super fast "Wonder Woman" go-cart. As fun as the go-carts were, it made for a short adventure, so everyone went inside to play arcade games - well everyone played but me and my sister (we're not big video game players).




For dinner that evening, we all split up and went our separate ways near Kart Kountry. Several people were insistent on wanting to go to Waffle House (no thank you!), several others went down to Taco Bell, and my sister and I decided to bond at Fazoli's as being the lesser of all the evils. On the way back to the Bryans' the gang wanted to stop in for another piece of pie at the Homemade Ice Cream & Pie Kitchen. Back at the Bryans' several people played on the Wii upstairs while others played Halo in the basement. Those playing Halo downstairs got their rears sufficiently whooped by a 13 year old in another state.




Wednesday:

This day was dedicated to the Frazier Arms Museum. A couple of the guys were not quite able to enjoy the significance of the museum, but for the most part everyone else quite enjoyed their time there. Nearly every hour there was a re-enactment performed on a stage on the first floor. Most were entertaining, a couple were kind of creepy. We also got to watch and learn the process of putting on a suit of armor - quite interesting and laborious.




Afterwards, we had yet another late lunch (all our lunches were usually around 2 or 3pm) this time we went to Mark's Feedstore so they could experience Kentucky barbecue. They loved it! I've even received requests to ship them some of Mark's barbecue sauce. From there a couple of the guys, Kati, and my sister headed over to my apartment to install a light fixture for me. And my sister even helped me get a few more things hung on the walls. The guys were quite frustrated with my apartment's wiring and while in the end they did manage to get the light fixture hung, um, it doesn't turn off! There is a switch on the wall that should turn the light on and off, but apparently it doesn't work because it was in the off position and the light was on, and the only way we could turn it back off was to flip the switch on the breaker. Oh well, good try guys! I have since removed the bulbs, but the fixture still hangs there. I'll figure that out another day!




That evening they grilled hamburgers, and we headed over to the Sooters' home to play Rock Band in their basement. Everyone seemed to REALLY enjoy Rock Band, I even hear that one or two of them have since purchased it after arriving back in Texas.




The gang left early Thursday morning, making a stop in Memphis to tour Graceland before embarking on the long journey back to Texas.

The group was a lot of fun to hang out with, and I'm glad I got to meet all the engaging individuals that my sister works with day in and day out. Thanks to all of them for letting me tag along on their Louisville adventure!

So many things...

Where do I start? This is gonna be a LONG update...I got to have an excellent vacation with my sister as we visited our aunt in California. 1) Who wouldn't love to go to southern California for vacation and 2) Stay with an amazing relative whose home has a view like this:



And boy did we enjoy our unhurried, unplanned vacation...We lazily rolled out of bed each morning according to our own inner clocks. One evening we spent at my sister's old work place hanging out with her former co-workers and the residents who love and miss my sister terribly. We had quite a wild evening of playing Uno Attack and air hockey with the residents while also watching American Idol. And they each had to have a picture taken with their beloved Wendy lady :)



Wendy and I also got to spend time with our aunt and her boyfriend, who is an excellent chef. My sister and aunt have raved to me time and again about his pizzas, and finally on this trip I got to experience the delectable heaven that one enters after tasting his gourmet masterpieces. For our eating pleasure, Ron created a divine steak and cheese pizza, a worldly Thai chicken pizza, and a comforting Italian meats pizza. In truth, most of my favorite vacation moments revolve around the food we ate. In fact, the one thing I was determined to do while we were there was to enjoy the light and fresh yumminess of having fruit filled crepes on the beach in the morning. Sigh....remembering...



Not long after I returned from my travels, my dear friend Robin flew up to visit me and to attend the Southeast Easter Pageant. And despite the miserably rainy and cold weekend, we enjoyed each other's company immensely. Yet again, one of the things we were determined to do while she was here was to make our own special pizza. We have this pizza, that was originally created by accident with my friends Misty and Sara, but Robin and I love to make it whenever we get together. I'm sure you are dying to know what is on this amazing pizza, and I will warn you that when you read the toppings you will probably think we are nuts - but I laugh at you, for if you were to let go of those enabling gag reflexes and open your mind and taste buds to the wondrous flavors of this pizza you too could have a party of flavor going on in your mouth! Here it is...we start with Marcy Bryan's pizza dough recipe for the crust, which is my job to make while Robin busily chops the toppings. After the crust is baked, I slather it with tomato sauce and then Robin comes in to do her magic. She tops the pizza first with turkey pepperoni (it's healthier for you), then mushrooms and olives, then artichoke hearts (see starts to get a little crazy there), and then the most wonderful ingredient of all: pico de gallo...oh, and handfuls of mozzarella cheese. Yes, you read that correctly - we put pico de gallo on our pizza - cringe if you must, but it is AMAZING. Anyone who wants to give it a go, I'll be happy to make it for you to try! We also celebrated our time together by making meatball subs after church with Robin's own meatball recipe. Ahhhhh, girl time - cooking and chatting and drinking wine and eating...so fun!

The last update is my oh-so-awesome new haircut! I loved growing my hair out and have had it long for several years now - it has been great fun. But I've been wanting to jump on the "donate my hair" bandwagon for the past couple of months - especially in light of my own family's many battles with cancer, particularly my grandmother's two battles with breast cancer. Plus, the long hair has really been getting on my nerves lately, and with all the new changes going on in my life - new city, new job, new church, new apartment - seems like a fine time to get a new haircut! And with all the gray peeking through - it was well past time to get it colored again. Don't you love it?! I do :)

See, it's sassy :)

And I think a shameless plug is due to the masterful hands of the one who cut it, the soon to be graduated (today in fact) Landon Arza - brother of my co-worker Cassie. Any Louisville locals who might possibly read this blog, I highly recommend him - soon to be working at Medusa, I believe. Now, my hair wasn't quite long enough (nor was I daring enough) to have 10 inches cut for Locks of Love - however, thanks to Oprah, I had been made aware of Pantene's Beautiful Lengths which is similar in it's purpose to Locks of Love. And they only require 8 inches! Thus, my hair is being mailed to them.

And maybe next time my blog will be more spiritual and ponderous in nature...I am in a bit of a writing mood...hmmmm